More thoughts on birthing

It occurred to me today that birthing with others present might be a challenge for me. Actually, I think that may be an understatement.

Here's what gave me a clue: Today, I was experiencing intestinal distress. I'm not sure what caused it; I only know that I was alone in my house, and as soon as a mildly strong cramp came upon me, I reached over and closed the door.

Initially, it struck me as funny that I had closed the door. The only other living being in the house was my cat, Phoebe. I wondered if it was merely habitual, having grown up with six other family members around me. Perhaps that is true to some degree; however, there is another truth. I closed the door because I much prefer to be alone while in distress.

Then I realized another lurking truth. In the throws of labor, those around me may need strong shields. I have no idea how I will handle having all eyes upon me while in pain, or strong discomfort, and vulnerable. I am not proud of this. I would much prefer to be a centered, though intense, birthing woman. However, I have an inkling that those around me may see another, more feisty, if you will, side. After all, I won't be able to close the door behind me when those strong urges and contractions arise.

My sister-in-law, in recounting this insight to her, suggested that I be pro-active about this. For example, she suggested that I leave little post-it-notes apologizing in advance, and sharing my appreciation for each person with me. If I shoot Joe a nasty look, he can then pick up a note, and remember its not about him. Clever idea.